gonna drink burgers & eat beer today

we don’t need 20 tweets listing the same releases every nmf

those aren’t fireworks you hear those are the backshots i’m giving her

she’s so hot she deserves the bare minimum

i thought i finished the bag last night but i have more for tonight

she put my bag in her box so it’s her flavored

taking too big of a bump builds character

the devil couldn’t reach me so he sent me a weekend fling

sunday scaries b2b comedown

wanna come over & look at me with your ssri stare

my favorite place to take a girl

i should get a job at a restaurant or a bar so i have some hot coworkers to flirt with

this post is from an account you muted

having 2 gfs that are each others gfs would be cool

it’s twitter crush tuesday

sammy virji is gonna have album of the year

she must be a squirrel the way she likes my nuts in her mouth

i’m not a yoga instructor but i’ll stretch her out

if you can’t handle me at my shitpost you don’t deserve me at my hitpost