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Bit rich coming from a club that hasn't delivered since 1992...

Anyone selling a general admission parklife weekend ticket? #parklife #parklifetickets

Lol

Feel sorry for all you pissants out there... So many of you!

Charlie Austin looks like a Hollyoaks baddie

@bradpeaa I'm certainly wide enough Brad!

Do you hate David Mutton? Martha Utton

I dare somebody to eat more than me today lol

@Boobz56 I've already eaten my body weight in chocolate

Last night a 13 year old thai boy was trying to link arms telling me to go home with him lol

What a waste of time lol

@hannah_johnson_ @ashtonxbarnard you veggie now?

@hannah_johnson_ @ashtonxbarnard what's the crack then?

@hannah_johnson_ @ashtonxbarnard nothing just curious

@hannah_johnson_ soz mo farah

Anyone that looks like me want to lend me their passport lol