Big Brain Once them born you as man, congratulations… you just signed a lifetime contract of ‘figure it out yourself.’ No refund, no customer care.” 😭😂

Burna Boy is literally the only celeb that comes through looking exactly like the screen… everybody else be 50% filter, 50% imagination 😂❤️

Pedri if you understand football, Bellingham if you love big moments, Vitinha if you actually watch matches.

Mbappé’s was cold, Vini’s was smooth, Lautaro’s was clinical… but De Bruyne’s strike had pure disrespect in it. That’s my pick.

If that’s her biggest insecurity then she’s actually winning in life. Some people would trade problems immediately….

The mama rejected ‘ordinary technician’ only for daughter to level up to politician husband… but we all know say politician money na ‘national cake’ special edition. Technician still dey fix AC, send pikin go good school, sleep with two eyes close. Politician wife? Dey dodge

Aba no just dey train people, Aba dey remove innocence from your business mindset. If you survive there, you can sell sand in the desert. 😂

Lmao ‘no other team can recreate this’, yeah because no other team is happy with mid table mediocrity and 7.1 averages from players who disappear in big games. Chelsea tax on ratings is wild, this squad would get exposed so fast outside the PL farm. Touch grass, plastic kings 😭

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JUST KINGS Dangote has $28.6B… 210 trillion missing = 5 Dangotes just vanished into thin air. Meanwhile, we dey beg for fuel subsidy like clowns. Na who dey run this country?” 😭💀

Dangote has $28.6B… 210 trillion missing = 5 Dangotes just vanished into thin air. Meanwhile, we dey beg for fuel subsidy like clowns. Na who dey run this country?” 😭💀

17 years old and already leading grown men in assists and chance creation… some of your favorite ‘world class’ players can’t even do that in their prime. 😮‍💨

World class’ is the most overused word in football… that’s why hearing it from Van der Sar actually means something. 🧤

So the plan to get back to the top is… charge the fans more? Bold strategy from a club that’s still struggling on the pitch. 😭

Reno Omokri going from attacking the government every day to becoming an ambassador… Nigerian politics really rewards consistency. 😭

Landlord bans tenants from buying outside… Next thing you know, he’ll be assigning prayer times and curfew. Nigerians, we literally fund our own oppression….

Nigeria is the only place where celebrities rebrand faster than phone updates… today actress, tomorrow prophetess. 😭