Miranda 🖤🤍💜 I say this as someone who believes in God. Religious people need to learn that their religion dictates what they can and can't do, not what other people can and can't do

I don't want lower taxes. I want hospital beds. Trains that run on time. Kids who aren't too hungry to learn. Libraries in every town. Rivers that don't run with slurry. Local councils not forced into bankruptcy. Politicians who don't venally line their own pockets.

there is absolutely no way i just witnessed this girl pull store-bought strawberries out of the dirt like she grew them herself.

🚨 🚨 jk rowling has gone WOKE her dog has they them pronouns 🚨🚨

I crocheted my friend 🥺🥺

Tickets for my one-man show GNAW are now available!!! Come and join me for StuFF at the University of Nottingham at 6pm on Monday. Come and see me perform for the first time in years! Reserve your tickets here: newtheatre.org.uk

I'm gonna explain to y'all why Britain considers 78°F/25°C hot. I know hot because I grew up in Texas and spent half my life in Las Vegas. So I am absolutely qualified to explain this to the rest of you who laugh at UK "heat waves".

It's weird that we talk so much about a "loneliness epidemic" but we don't really talk to people about how to make friends or why they are not making friends. So, a few things. I've said this before and people get very angry about me — but something has to replace smoking.

trump saying he doesn’t want pronouns after an interview tells him kamala has she/her in her bio and the interviewer responding with “so you’re fluid” is the funniest fucking thing i’ve ever heard

deadnaming is only ever okay in two scenarios. 1. a trans person has asked you to, for their safety 2. when talking about twitter

The more things change, the more they stay the same...

One thing I keep returning to with this case is that Gisele lived in a small town—about 6,000 people—and in that community a high enough proportion of the men were frequenting rapist sites that her husband was able to recruit about 90 men to attack her.

Today at my library job: *5th grade girl*: “I just finished reading Little Women and I loved it! Do you have any other books like it?!?” *Me*: “have you read *Anne of Green Gables*?” *Her*: “no” *Me*: “girl, I am about to change your life”

The fact I was taught this at school is infuriating

Guess you could say shits getting pretty real

GNU Dame Maggie Smith. My perfect Granny Weatherwax. Mind how you go.

🧵I once heard a plus-sized creator say she knows her friends love her, but she's also aware that one of their biggest fears is looking like her and that really stuck with me

But those are my emotional support tabs

“I let my intrusive thoughts win and ordered delivery food” So close!! That was an “impulse”, not an “intrusive thought”. An intrusive thought is a thought genuinely separate from You that runs completely contrary to your personality traits, like “I should kick that puppy”