me joining the political discussions at the after

*attempting to brainstorm ideas for what to cook us for dinner* him:

laughing at a tweet realizing it’s mine

me if going to the bar on friday night and talking to no girls was illegal

is my fortune cookie telling me i’m gonna get raped ?

when your friend posts a photo for your birthday

me and leip when he was on twitter

when my friends ask if the bag is gas

men take one picture in a suit for a junior varsity dinner & start captioning their pics quotes about success.

my bf keeps asking me to sip johnny walker in the war room and i won’t… #AITA

i’m a fat lard

there’s nothing better than a skinny mfkn vodka soda i geel fucking great

the worst guy in the world is the dude who insists he gets the bill while everyone is fighting over paying for it then tips you $1.50

top 5 worst bag rotation

you know if this is ur first like ur about to flop

at work, a girl meets a guy for a first date, first thing that comes out of his mouth, “so you know andrew tate, right?”

what ru guys gonna do now when the hoes show up?

day 1 of not checking his likes