What kind of bagel can fly? A plain bagel. #dadjokes

Where does batman go to the bathroom? The batroom. #dadjokes

What did the beaver say to the tree? It's been nice gnawing you. #dadjokes

I got fired from the transmission factor, turns out I didn't put on enough shifts... #dadjokes

How does a dyslexic poet write? Inverse. #dadjokes

Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? The baa-baa shop. #dadjokes

If you want a job in the moisturizer industry, the best advice I can give is to apply daily. #dadjokes

What does an angry pepper do? It gets jalapeño face. #dadjokes

Why did the opera singer go sailing? They wanted to hit the high Cs. #dadjokes

What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down? It gets toad. #dadjokes

What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATH!! #dadjokes

Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now. #dadjokes

I’ve just been reading a book about anti-gravity, it’s impossible to put down! #dadjokes

What did one snowman say to the other snow man? Do you smell carrot? #dadjokes

I’ve deleted the phone numbers of all the Germans I know from my mobile phone. Now it’s Hans free. #dadjokes

I couldn't get a reservation at the library. They were completely booked. #dadjokes

Why can't eggs have love? They will break up too soon. #dadjokes

Don't buy flowers at a monastery. Because only you can prevent florist friars. #dadjokes

I went to a Foo Fighters Concert once... It was Everlong... #dadjokes

What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep? A stega-snore-us. #dadjokes