“Dude, she literally made braille.”

“This is the newest lock they’ve come up with and it’s said to be one of the safest there is. I’m going to unlock it with a red bull can.” -Mr Hendrix

“he would be hot hot if he had teeth...”

“fun fact: i HAVE peed my shirt.” -caleb

“i gotta call you back, i’m awestruck in childlike wonder.”

“just take him to the aspergers testing store”

Caleb on the Cuban Missile Crisis: “Whatever.”

“you’re a wingding girl living in an arial world.” -hendrix

i want sonic swag

“the perfect crime: poop.” hendrix

“alright so we have four skins” -caleb

“🧐✍🏻💅🏻👨‍❤️‍👨” -caleb

“your momma’s a fart bag” -my dad

“a poop sock is just a poop sock”

“their meat is like, insane” -jb

“my man, i wear jeans with flip flops. i look like mental illness won.” -jb

the E in my name stands for Everything you’ve ever wanted