also if gandalf didn’t wait pippin to look into the palantir maybe he should’ve said that instead of being sketchy as hell about it

little known fact: the king in “return of the king” actually refers not to aragorn but to samwise gamgee, king of Getting Shit Done Unlike Everyone Else

i love how aragorn gets his hair done to look pretty during the last battle at the gates of mordor

i know those videos of people squeezing whole heads of roasted garlic out of their peels are supposed to look tasty but they are so utterly horrifying

i have a pimple on my earlobe

how come nobody ever brings a grocery store cookie cake to school when you’re an adult

i’m sorry but there is no way there are 3 million people in this world who pay for snapchat

stop making bras with removable pads!!!!!!! if i wanted a non-padded bra i would just buy a non-padded bra!!!!!!!!!! they just get all bunched up and its a pain in the fuckin ass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

high and thinkin about journalism

In 2020, a group of prominent writers, including J.K. Rowling, signed an open letter to Harper's Magazine defending free speech and argument against "reprisal" for "bad ideas," and I guarantee you not one of them will say anything about this. 1/

my toxic trait is that i fucking love fireworks

don’t worry everyone, i got my tickets to see barbie on opening night at the drive in

my office building installed cell phone holders in the bathroom stalls??

why?????

one of the best sci-fi/fantasy tropes is “this fucked up looking alien/monster/creature/little guy was scary at first but now he’s my best friend and i will defend him with my life”

does anyone know spirit halloween’s return policy