A very specific burn

I’ve never seen a dog quite like this one

It just occurred to me how apt “upset stomach” is. I couldn’t keep anything down yesterday and it was like my stomach was just pissed at me (for good reason)

I sometimes take for granted living here, but hearing visitors excitedly waiting to board the ferry from Sausilito to SF snapped me out of that

I would like to know more about my neighbor, who is blasting Blues Traveler

I feel like it’s a weird but significant milestone that I just exchanged numbers with the person who owns my favorite neighborhood corner store

What are the chances this is actually filled with poop?

After 11 year of living in my apartment, I still don’t know whose wifi network this is

We did it

This feels like a significant human achievement

I dreamt a lot about raccoons last night

In the span of a year, I’ve gone from knowing one Vanessa to seven. Still unclear whether there is cause for concern

I really hope the couple I saw making out in a Taco Bell cantina several years ago made it

I haven’t eaten meat in almost 30 years but just had a very involved dream about cooking myself a steak

I’m somehow not on the part of this app where people are talking about one of the best parts of remote work, which is being able to poop during meetings

I’m so thankful my childhood dream of typing in Slack all day has become a reality

I think it says a lot about my childhood that I still occasionally get the Latin translation of Jingle Bells stuck in my head

I’ve never seen so many bloody nipples as I did today watching the Boston Marathon

It was just rude for a mosquito to bite the bottom of my foot

I’m glad the other William D who just got weed delivered has a similar order to mine. I wonder what his sign is