The dudes throwing a fit over the Gillette ad don't realize how fast my panties drop when a man says "yo, not cool" to another man. #GilletteAd #gillette #women

I guess I'm back on Twitter.

Woke up to Faith D'Amato playing The Circle on Netflix and it's ruined my ability to trust her with 2020. But here I am 2 hours later still rooting for Shubham Goel

I did a dumb thing to help you wait on Nevada. youtu.be/2q6JSYjhHr0

Hi, just a reminder: parking tickets are barbaric and inequitable. The difference between being fined for misreading a sign for someone with money and for someone who lost their job in a pandemic is the difference between an annoyance and not buying food this week. Gavin Newsom

Well. x.com/uberfacts/stat…

I entered the lotto to see BURIED CHILD at The New Group for $30! Enter here: go.todaytix.com/TTBuriedChild #BuriedChildLotto

I joined the lottery to see @FunHomeMusical for $35 tickets on TodayTix! Enter here: go.todaytix.com/TTFunHome

I entered the lotto to see BURIED CHILD at The New Group for $30! Enter here: go.todaytix.com/TTBuriedChild #BuriedChildLotto

Puppet yoda is just so much cuter than CGI yoda.

Does it take anyone else 3x longer to watch the Star Wars movies because they keep not paying attention and having to rewind?

Hurry! Enter to win this great prize pack of #primalpalatespices and #tinstarfoods ghee! Ends soon! Enter here >> primalpalate.com/paleo-blog/tin…

The most tangible loser in Trump's presidency so far is women's health. x.com/aslavitt/statu…

I made a bingo board of people I wanted to kiss to get over my broken heart, and it worked.

I'm back. But only to live tweet Cheetah Girls 2.

Why is one side of her jeans shorts and the other side pants. "It's like the mullet of jeans" - Faith D'Amato

Got a phone call from one of the moms I sit for and panic I've broken something, but she says "Oh my god, Big Little Lies" #nannylife #HBO

Ok, I wasn't going to weigh in on T. Swifts career but... Oh, no wait. I 👏🏽still 👏🏽don't 👏🏽 care 👏🏽 #firstworldproblems #taylorswift

Pretending I can pull off this new haircut by @hillbphill and it luckily goes perfectly with… instagram.com/p/BgcucR-Doxg/

Trying to focus on the director talking in my ears and ignore @vodoctor all up in my face taking… instagram.com/p/Bh2kU_3j1mT/