I don’t trust anyone that orders a steak well done

Today was Dave's first day at his new job. I am so incredibly happy for him, and I can't wait to hear all about it. 🤩

Friends, do me a favor. Spend time on your self care. I don't care what it means. Go for a walk, read a book, spend the day at the spa. Take care of you.

Spend time on JUST you. An excellent starting point would be the cleansing step of your skin care routine. First cleanse: 1 minute. Dry your skin, and see what areas need extra TLC. Second cleanse: 5-7 minutes, and concentrate on your problem areas. Thank me later.

waffles > pancakes 🥞 🧇

I'm about to take my practical exam, and all I can think is, "OMG I'm gonna barf all over my work station and I don't think I have enough barbicide wipes to clean it up." 😅🙃 Send good vibes.

We get to meet our son in 8 weeks or less, and my heart cannot handle it 😭

Tell me why my chin started quivering while listening to "I just can't wait to be king" from The Lion King??? Pregnancy emotions are a whole different beast, man.

I am just overwhelmed with how much love and support we received today for our sweet boy. I can't believe in just 7 weeks that we'll get to finally hold him in our arms. I could just cry, y'all. 💙

The whole view that the LGBTQ+ community is a danger to the world. God forbid a man should kiss a man in an ad, a drag queen reads a book to a child or a character in a kids cartoon has 2 mums, when in fact the only people who have been dangerous, are the people who hate us.

We finally put up the crib and unpacked all of the bags from our baby shower. As soon as the crib was finished, I wanted to sob happy tears. I am so fucking excited to watch us become parents. 😭💙🥹

Nothing will make you feel more immature than when the lactation consultant is holding your baby, who is just ripping ass, and you are visibly trying to hold back your laughter. She was completely unbothered, and I'm sitting there like

She really said “y’all about to hear my mouth” and not one word was out of place. 👏🏼

Ya know, I got a bone to pick with everyone that had kids before I did. NONE of y'all talked about how it takes 37 fucking minutes to cut baby fingernails and toe nails, and by the time you're done, you gotta start back over 🙃

I love that my six months old loves guacamole like I do, but now, that means I have to share it forever. I wasn't prepared for that.

I'm seeing Pentatonix in Raleigh on Saturday and I just know I'm gonna fuckin cry 😭😍💃🏼

I thought the newborn stage was rough...that shit was a fucking CAKE WALK compared to the teething stage. Sending sleep vibes because I've been awake since 4:45am, worked both jobs, and just waiting until this kid wakes up screaming again 😅

If you're a parent going through teething with your little...I fucking get it, bro. This is a slow and painful death that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.