739 left. I’ve officially found one that’s stumped me. No idea what I’m looking at. Seriously, do I need an engineering degree to figure this out? #DiddyCount #UnsolvableMystery

738 left. Every time I think it can’t get weirder… it does. At this point, I’m convinced Diddy was running a side business selling adult toys on Mars. This one’s either a futuristic gadget… or I’m hallucinating. Both seem equally likely. #DiddyCount #EndlessWeirdness

737 left. Forget the police force. I’m opening the world’s weirdest museum. The Johnson Museum of Misfit Toys—admission free, but you’ll need a therapist on standby after your visit. #DiddyCount #JohnsonMuseumOfWeird

736 left. What day is it? What year is it? I’ve lost all sense of time. Am I still in 2024, or did I time-travel while logging these? Feels like I’ve been here since the dawn of civilization. #DiddyCount #TimeIsAnIllusion

735 left. Just logged one that looks like something from an anime. I’m half-expecting it to shoot a rainbow beam and teach me the power of friendship? #DiddyCount #WeebAlert

734 left. Hypothetically, how many dildos does one person really need? I’m not judging anyone’s lifestyle here, but we’ve passed the point of ‘personal collection’ and entered ‘world domination plan.’ #DiddyCount #SeriousQuestions”

733 left. I swear I logged this exact one three dildos ago. Did it multiply? Is this some kind of cruel prank? I’m either going crazy or these things have backup dancers. #DiddyCount #LosingMyMind

732 left. This one looks like it belongs in a deleted scene from 50 Shades. Pretty sure this didn’t make it to the big screen, but here it is… in all its glory. #DiddyCount #LostChapter

731 left. Was this thing forged in the fires of Mordor? It’s got that medieval, ‘I’m here to slay dragons and take names’ vibe. #DiddyCount #KnightsOfTheWeird

730 left. I think I’ve officially disconnected from reality. I’m just a floating consciousness now, detached from this physical plane. My body’s here logging dildos, but my soul? Gone. It left around #750. #DiddyCount #FloatingThroughLife

729 left. Almost halfway! Gotta stay positive. Look at me, staying upbeat! #DiddyCount #DelusionalOptimism

728 left. I think someone got creative with this one. DIY gone wrong. It’s either a Pinterest fail or a masterpiece, and honestly, I can’t decide which. #DiddyCount #Handcrafted

727 left. Whoever designed this had a serious case of rainbow fever. It’s like the Lisa Frank of dildos. #DiddyCount #TasteTheRainbow

726 left. This isn’t a dildo. This is alien technology. I’m pretty sure I’m holding something designed by extraterrestrials, or Diddy has next-level taste. #DiddyCount #AlienTech

725 left. Whatever this is, I’m sure it wasn’t made for human hands. I’m convinced this was built for intergalactic use. It’s sleek, it’s futuristic, and it probably has its own gravity system. #DiddyCount #SpaceAge

724 left. This one belongs in a gallery. Maybe it’s a metaphor for something deeper, or maybe I’ve been staring at these things for too long and I’m losing my grip on what’s real. #DiddyCount #ArtIsSubjective

723 left, and I’m starting to think this job never ends. Maybe this is my eternity. Maybe I’ll be here forever, cataloging dildos in an endless loop. #DiddyCount #InfiniteDildos

722 left. I’m not a designer, but I’m 99% sure this is what happens when you give a 4-year-old a sketchbook and say, ‘Go wild.’ It’s… creative, I guess? #DiddyCount #DesignChoices

721 left. Just logged one shaped like an iconic cartoon character. This is officially too far. There are some things you just shouldn’t mess with, and this is one of them. #DiddyCount #Why

720 left. Am I even logging these anymore, or is my hand just moving on its own? I’ve officially lost the battle. My brain left the building, and I’m on autopilot. There’s no coming back from this. #DiddyCount #MentallyGone