Luke (@1ntoxicologist) 's Twitter Profile
Luke

@1ntoxicologist

I tweet about bar/restaurant things: drinks, and the things people at the bar do & say. Shots anyone? #bartenderproblems #MrPetYourDog

ID: 86811766

calendar_today01-11-2009 21:57:48

3,3K Tweet

1,1K Followers

1,1K Following

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If you like your meat medium/medium-rare but your S/O needs everything well done and dried out to shit.. It’s never going to work out. #TheMoreYouKnow

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Managers should have to be re-qualified or checked every year to remain in the role. Too many managers keep their title and coast by as they grow more entitled, detached, and stubborn/stuck in their ways over the years. /rant

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When will Capri Sun come up with an adult line with alcohol that will give us 80s and 90s kids some much needed joy ??

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My absolute favorite is when I walk up to a bar and the bartender is on the phone and I wait until they’re done to finally acknowledge me. Cherry on top is acting annoyed they had to put their phone away in order to tend to me.

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Biggest drinking night of the year is upon us. Lots of amateurs come out of the woodwork, and I see Blackout Wednesday trending, so good luck to you industry folks working tonight!! Be safe! #bartenderproblems #fohproblems

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Eclipse drinking game: You and your friends, each with 5 beers, waterfall around the group non-stop from beginning of totality to the end of total eclipse. Just absolute mayhem for 4 minutes. You’re welcome. #Eclipse2024 #Eclipse

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Finally tried TB’s cheesy street chalupas, definitely worth getting. However, I noticed that there was noticeably LESS SAUCE in my TACO BELL packets compared to my previous experiences. Is this a thing? Have they lessened the contents or did I get shorted packs? Taco Bell

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I don’t have a ‘goblin mode’ or even a ‘gremlin mode’, at most I go ‘Keebler Elf mode’ and that’s gonna have to be enough.

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Draw game/lottery customers are the worst at the bar. Yes, I see you waving your tickets and money at me. And yes, I know the game is about to start. But it’s busy, these people have been waiting longer than you for a drink.. And you don’t tip.

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20 years from now there will be a scandal about how a presidential candidate harassed an AI girlfriend bot with chat log proof leaked by said AI chatbot.

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Hey, Grok, who was the most famous person to visit my profile? It doesn't need to be a mutual, don't tag them, just let me know who. Thanks!

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I order through a restaurant’s site to pick up soup and rice, at checkout am asked if I want to tip 18%, 20%, or 22%. I overtip when I dine in & when someone delivers, but I draw the line picking up my own food. I never expected a tip from people picking up their to-go orders.

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Imagine posting your funniest and most creative tweet/status today, and thanks to this Verizon outage, nobody sees it and it’s missed and tossed into the social media abyss. #SOS

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The Shane Gillis show at MSG tonight felt like one huge ad for WALMART clothing. Big ‘dad at a picnic’ meets ‘Midtown unhoused sleeping on sidewalk’ chic. Obviously, funny dudes, but damn boys.