Twitter Beğeni Hilesi

My girlfriend told me to take the spider out instead of killing it. We went and had some drinks. Cool guy. Wants to be a web developer.

> It'll just be a quick fix Narrator: It wasn't.

Twitter just notified me I have been on the platform for 10 years as of today. 10 years. (I would say more but I will run out of charac

(I guess it’s getting harder and harder to make that “running out of characters” joke seeing that they bumped up the limit since I’ve last tweeted)

(Also now that this is 3 in a row, does this mean I’m in “tweet storm” territory?)

Kalen Jordan jiffy lube is the godaddy of oil changes.

I wonder what happens at their rallies.

Honestly hadn’t planned on giving up quite this much for Lent.

As your favorite parody twitter account, your health and safety is my number one priority. I will be cleaning and disinfecting each individual tweet, and hitting send using a sanitized elbow.

The only social distancing I plan on participating in is staying away from all the people that have bought all the dang toilet paper.

“6 feet apart, or 6 feet down” ~ Daryl, 2020, last known Coronavirus survivor

What's the german word for the anger you feel when you sign up for a free trial intending to cancel before you're charged and you don't cancel in time.

Saw a bird eating a piece of avocado toast. Guess it was some kind of millennial falcon.

R.I.P. 2017 (2017 - 2017)

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Is it unpatriotic to cheer for the Eagles?

Cheap developers cost the most money.

Abraham: “Son, you’re the goat.” Isaac: “Gee, dad, thanks. I think you’re the greatest of all time too.” A: “Well, uh, son, you may not always think so. . .”

When you a web developer and the joke goes too far: foxbusiness.com/features/patri…

*gets more snow in first few hours of Spring than all Winter* #PennsylvaniaWeather