Finally a public vote that the UK didn't fuck up 👏👏 Well done Dani and Jack! #loveisland

Well that’s ITV2 done for the year back to the 40 Year Old Virgin & Family Guy #LoveIsland

finding random stuff like this makes me happy. best part of having kids.

Happy birthday to the absolutely wonderful Kate Winslet. My love for you is wider than that door you totally could have shared with Jack.

Happy birthday, Snoop Dogg! I hope your candles aren't the only things that gets lit.

brought a girl back to mine last night , got into the house and of course my dog was going nuts welcoming her and being happy cause its a new person , the wee girl said she didnt like my dog and to put "it" upstairs , rang a taxi and on she went and that was the end of that

Just so we’re clear, The Grinch never really hated Christmas. He hated people, which is fair.

When you hit you elbow on the table and get a temporary shock

Is it sad that I am more heartbroken that I didn’t have a pancake on shrove Tuesday than having a valentines yesterday? 😩😂

So… when Kim, Putin, Trump and dem man all start their Nuke-off, where’s the spot to jam? Where’s the blessest place to be? So I can cop a property there now quickly.