Not saying I'm old, but Cardi B is what I call my back-up cardigan

I put some fridge magnets on my fridge door and now it's covered in fridges

In my spare time I enjoy going to the theatre, listening to music, and cooking Indian food, although everyone watching the play never seems very impressed

Facebook reels are all like, “my grandma taught me this” and it’s just someone putting their shirt on a hanger

After Adam and Eve realized they were naked and hastily cobbled together some clothing from leaves, Eve looked at Adam and asked, "Is that what you're wearing?"

When I drape some toilet paper over the bath to help the spider climb out

All the bad stuff that’s going on is punishment for not copying and pasting your Facebook friend’s status to “see who actually reads it”

"I Really Really Really Wanna Sieg a Sieg Heil"

A really good podcast with an excellent guest, social media’s own ⁦Craig Deeley 🇪🇺🏳️‍🌈 🇺🇦⁩ podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/bon…

Northern Ireland's favourite game show is Countydown

“I don’t know the Malverns or Brecon Beacons but they sound funny” “Yes, they’re hill areas”

I'm just a boy, standing in front of an open fridge, knowing this is not what I came in here for

YES I’LL JUMP TO RECIPE

What does this man have against cake toppings?

My biggest fear of self driving cars is that if I would die on the way to work, the car would still drive me there.

They should have a special rapture for people like me who missed the rapture because they were on the toilet. They could call it the crapture.

Still no response from my Microsoft Error Report 11 years ago

Strange name for a dog

The most disappointing thing for me when I visited the Louvre was that none of its doors had slats

In 1980, Patricia Routledge joined the cast of the NY Public Theater's outdoor Pirates of Penzance in Central Park. Here she is with Rex Smith and Kevin Kline. 1/2