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Please rise

these debates could be shorter if we didn't have to hear men talk about their opinions on women's rights.

This is what being locked in looks like…

Lots of coyote yapping tonight

Every Padres season in history, except THIS one.

Check out my ASMR channel where I quietly mispronounce the names of chemical additives added to our food.

Sorry I haven’t been on as much been flying over Alberta quite a bit lately dropping chemtrails

Literally me in my CRISPR lab in the garage

Hey baby how about you and me resort to some minor crimes ourselves

I’d learn more about you telling me whether that mustache is ironic or unironic than ten minutes of small talk, Bud.

Just took a 15 minute survey obv funded by Todd Gloria. I took a little pride in telling the kind woman how gladly he criminalized being houseless and being bought by developers. The other guy doesn’t live in SD. I’m leaving it blank instead of risk mitigation.

"One year soon, the baseball gods will smile upon the San Diego #Padres. And we will have a parade." -Peter Seidler

Robert Suarez shows up BIG again Give him his flowers, San Diego

See you tomorrow Padres fans! 😁

For all those asking if I like “cool merch,” I gotta be honest and say I don’t

I walked in the bathroom and it smells so bad in here.

Wait I thought me being fed to the bear WAS the punishment….

My wife said tonight “Sometimes when your back gives out you’re like a scary ogre, but a cute ogre. “ That was nice. (Eats possum)