If the Jan 6th people wanted to shut down the government, they shouldn't have had an insurrection. They should have asked them to approve a budget.

My boyfriend suggested I get a dream journal. Little does he know, he is my dream journal ✨

Seward Alaska!! Watch your sweet asses because here comes the Best of B4UDie. The Yukon Bar in Seward Saturday April 8th.

Look! All my exes!

I'm too full to do anything. But before I was too hungry to do anything. When am I supposed to do my things?!?!?

I have a super bowl every time I get my period

Finally seeing how many people are grandfathered into the entertainment industry. All these "just your average guy"s and "girl next door"s have parents who were on Broadway & won Emmy's, and I'm over here like "my dad does electrical work and thinks art is for pussies 🤗"

Why hasn't there been any Supreme Court justice assassination attempts? It's not like there'd be any consequences, we just have to get Alec Baldwin to do it

dropped my drake diss track years ago kendrick please write on✨drake, the musical!✨

Thank you to my neighbor and their 8 am pan flute practice schedule. I was running out of reasons to want to die

My neighbor on one side is sleeping through their alarm, my neighbor on the other side is practicing the flute at a third grade level. Me, in the middle, descends into madness.

Of course fucking liberals have no aim 🤦🏼‍♀️

Liberals need to spend less time at Gun Control marches and more time and the shooting range 😒

*denounces hamas*

interviewed people at the pro-life rally— met the anti-hawktuah girl #abortion #prochoice #satire

Remember Covid when everyone had a casual psychotic episode? FOTS News is releasing its full Covid episode from the vault this WEDNESDAY 8/7 at 7pst. So much time has passed without us knowing what the elites were doing behind closed doors! Join us for clarity & wisdom 🦅🇺🇸🌎

Inflations getting outta hand

Just being on Hollywood blvd makes me feel sticky