It’s crazy you can go to whatever college you want just by telling people you went there

What if Kareem ripped off that jacket, revealing a Thunder jersey, and went and got the record back?

This is a great time to be outside if you enjoy watching people carry food

Some of y’all have some of the most disgusting air pod cases. It’s so gross and so are you. I can say that, because I just cleaned mine for the first time in…several years…so mine looks like my ears are super clean.

Anytime a comic posts where they’re performing I send a DM like “great room” or “tell Greg i said hey” that way they know I’ve also performed there

lori lightfoot leaving walgreens with a pack of modelos

Once again, a 23 year old has ruined my day because he didn’t get 8+ assists

Why not us? 🤔

Ps4 would do this better

Idk why dudes get so mad, some of the most supportive people in my life are women who I tried to fuck but said no thanks.

They indicted Trump, T. But just for payin' off some broad, not for any of the fun shít.

I’ll sneeze 17 consecutive times idgaf

Bout to make these NPR libs go crazy

“ The movie wasn’t enough for you people?!??” -James Cameron

Lining up the triangles on an ibuprofen bottle got me feeling like indiana jones 😂😂😂🤣🤣

New Yorkers do not care about you

Lol

Where do people with kids find the time to stare at their phone?