No such things as small portions in my house. Ate so much shit today and could demolish 2 plates of this 🤤

Big 30 today, I’m officially classed as old. But happy birthday to me 🎉😩😂

Can’t whinge that I’m fat, when I eat a load of crap 🤷🏻‍♀️🐽 🤤

Is it just me or is half of the stuff in JD a load of shit. The quality of some of the stuff is shite, but over priced. Rather waste me money in primark than pay £100 for a jumper that isn’t gonna last after one wash. 🙄

What about humans?! They’re more dangerous than dogs.

Nah I’m telling you right now, this mother fucker isn’t the real plane lady.

Ordered a takeaway and it’s nothing but proper grease. £16 straight in the bin. 🤮

Get up go to work go home sleep
Get up go to work go home sleep
Get up go to work go home sleep
Get up go to work go home sleep
Get up go to work go home sleep

Doctors are fucking useless these days, have no clue what so ever. Get paid for fuck all.

Netflix is such a waste of money, nothing but a pile of shite on it.

Harness your inner Stanley this #NationalPretzelDay 🥨

Another year older. Yay! 🙄😂🥳

Falling asleep already, I definitely won’t be seeing the new year in 😂🥱

As if I’ve waited 3 hours for a Chinese 🙄

Every employer should give their staff the whole of December off.

My body clock is fucked, more tired than usual 🥱

Could do with a footballers wage right now.

Come to work and nobody is here 😐

The Royal Family could have easily funded this funeral with the money they pay no tax on, but chose to let the taxpayer pay for it during a cost of living crisis and the entire country is on its knees. These are the people that everybody respects and reveres so much?