Hell is an unending strata AGM. I’m certain of this.

This is everything I’ve ever wanted in life

I (87m) began dating a woman (2,778f) against the wishes of her father. she has promised to bind herself to me, forsaking the immortal life of her people. AITA?

It’s the 15th anniversary of the best moment in #GoldenGlobes history, when Kate Winslet declared her love for Leonardo DiCaprio from the stage. I’ll never be over it. #GoldenGlobes 2024

The offensive material is how bad it all is

“I was sent down to see about these Golden Globes jokes. See who’s making them.”

In 2023 I renovated my home (a goal for years; I never thought it was worth spending the money on a place to live alone), read more books, spent more time with friends, put myself back out there on the apps, and FULFILLED A LIFELONG DREAM with my best friend there to watch

YESSSS I won the football pool this week which is a mighty achievement considering I pick the winners based on criteria like “Marshall from HIMYM liked the Vikings” and “I have to pick the Saints for Jay Kohut”.

This might be my favourite one ever

I am crying

Today I learned a trip to New West was recently a prize on The Price is Right and all I can think is that someone didn’t listen to Justin McElroy explain that New West is not, in fact, the new Brooklyn.

Today’s win: correctly identifying who Samantha Irby meant on her blog when she wrote: “he looks almost exactly like that white-haired actor who’s in almost every movie and TV show ever made”.

IKEA, it doesn’t matter how sad and frustrated you make the little man, I still don’t have someone to help me build furniture and I’m gonna do it alone and YOU JUST HAVE TO DEAL

Wait, should I dig out my jerseys and become a hockey fan again? Sara Jones maybe I’m ready to come back to the fold

I need to make desserts for 19 people and somehow it’s become 2pm and I haven’t started and this is going to go badly, isn’t it?

So proud of our amazing staff at New West Farmers Market who scored this nomination!

This is the happiest I’ve been in weeks ahhhhhhh

Felt a sudden need to rewatch The Battle of the Bastards tonight. Holds up.