Jerry sat on the whiteboard at a team meeting and erased half of the signature with his ass. RIP

We’re getting the band back together!

For the first time ever, our regional rival/ arch nemesis Doublewide finally has some good content

Roster reveals are for cowards who are afraid to cheat and pay for big talent names

Obviously we broke seed with the aid of unrostered Witchita mercenaries . Kasaan dumpstered those losers in Dallas time for a celebratory meal and victory to the north!

Who would win? A Texas Tournament that has been around and sanctioned for years or one (1) dehydrated boi?

We never get handed spirit awards. Probably because everyone on our team is too spirited, y’know. Yeah.

Ultimate is as easy your ABCs: Always Be Contesting Dumb Enemy Fouls.

On the field is not a place to be reasonable NOR rational

Remember if you’re going for the disc (i.e playing frisbee the way god intended) you cannot foul another player and you are absolved of all sin

5 years of being the South Centrals worst (Twitter) nightmare #MyTwitterAnniversary

If Ultimate evaluated more noble, metaphysical qualities as opposed to things menial things like “points” and “score,” there’s no doubt in my mind we’d take natties every year. We’d be so dominate they’d rename the “disc” to a “cell” and change “Ultimate” to “Super”

For those (many) who are blowing up our DMs asking why any of our standouts weren’t invited to U24: we were. They asked the whole team to play in the open division, age be damned. Thing is we have our sights on a bigger goal this season: Holding Seed

Someone please tell me that spirit scores work like golf

What are y’all’s favorite snacks to bring to a tournament?? Ours is Kenneth 😊

Barnstorm broke seed this weekend. Who the FUCK do they think they are? THINK YIURE BETTER THAN US HUH?

Why would we hold seed at Regionals again this year? We know our fans love it, but too much of a good thing isn’t really a good thing—that’s why we aren’t even going this year.