Snake taxi 🐸 🐍

My Uber driver has been 1 minute away for 20 minutes.

Ace of Base or get out of my face 🤷🏻‍♂️

Follow me for tips on how to get a sunburn, ONLY on your neck.

WAP and Waterpiks are equally messy.

Not being ready never stopped anything.

goals

My toxic trait is reading and loving a book, but not being able to remember a thing about it.

I just saw a post saying not to let pets outside during the eclipse but I’m not even sure my dog knows the sky exists so I think he’s gonna be ok

If I get a chance to make it weird I'ma take it.

Casey Duncan *boop*

Villains don't twirl their mustache like they used to

but she’s taking some time to work on herself

universe giving me big 'you know what you did' energy lately

Casey Duncan Why would you do that? Did I walk in at the wrong time and forget to close the door?

Is coffee slut a thing? I think that’s what I am.

Every cast member from SNL has a show on Apple TV 🤷🏻‍♂️

Sometimes when I walk past a mirror instead of flexing I'll just give myself the ole 'side eye' just to see how I'll react

Lotta people mistake me for an adult because of my age