My mother once told me that she used to eat only a candy bar for breakfast in school because she wanted sweets, but didn’t want the calories. “This way the calories didn’t count because I had all day to work them off.” #nevermindthesugarcrash #saidwithoutirony

My mother’s favorite cocktail: pre-made chocolate milk (the kind that comes in a gallon jug) mixed with Sköl Vodka ...I really wish I was kidding.

Mom: “who’s that singer who sings about sunshine that’s named after Citrus?” Me: “Vitamin C?” Mom: “YES!”

Day after #Halloween breakfast...because I have all day to work off the calories, right?