In terms of my tire… ummmm… let’s just say… I’m a little screwed

Real

Literally me

This song goes so hard live

Spoon - The Beast and Dragon, Adored (2005)

When you go into Walmart, there should be some ominous music and it should say “Walmart” above you in a big creepy font like when you walk into a new area in Dark Souls or Bloodborne

Watching a miniseries about Brigitte Bardot and the guy who plays her dad kinda looks like Budd Dwyer

Laundry mat name idea: Ben Folds Five

Ottawa continues to amaze me by finding new roads to rip-up on a constant basis

My Uber driver is blasting Creed right now

Can you imagine if they played Survivor on the beach that makes people old?

Shaun of the Dead (2004)

I’m finally at the age where I just grunt randomly

Ladies, if your toaster doesn’t have a bagel button, that ain’t no toaster!

Stance has the “Ok bitch, Call the Cops. I’ll have sex with them.” Tweety Bird socks

The rats in the Nutcracker

This is the ideal male body. You may not like it, but this is what peak performance looks like.