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"IT WAS A DAY I'LL REMEMBER FOREVER" - Court appearance tomorrow at 10:30am for Dona Bissey of Indiana Bissey is accused of posting the photo with a "Q" image celebrating January 6 on her Facebook page, after allegedly being part of the breach

Twit-Poll: What horrible death did you imagine for the 33-Year-Old smug fucker riding his longboard to work this morning? #SmugFuckerDeaths

I prefer the term "Shithead's Christmas" instead of "April Fool's Day."

Hey folks, here's Megan Amram, being goddamn brilliant as usual: AYN RANDERS: bit.ly/HOenzq

Cop Grudgingly Admits Suspect Is The Best Goddamn Pedophile He's Seen In 30 Years On The Force onion.com/LfTgtj

American Voices | "But great whites play a necessary ecological role in controlling the surfer population." onion.com/NGnK2x

Activities Fair Helps New Freshman Pick Which Clubs They'd Like To Attend Exactly One Meeting Of #OnionBackToSchool onion.com/Nqxcb2

Onion Sports examines some of the innovative features of the controversial, $315 LeBron X sneaker. onion.com/OD2QmI #LeBronShoe

Op-Ed by Mitt Romney | Now That My Campaign Is Over, I'd Like To Talk To You All About The Church Of Latter-Day Saints onion.com/PA8fgg

Israel Calls For Increase In U.S. Taxes To Fund Attacks On Gaza onion.com/TV9E2L

REPORTS: LSU coach Les Miles has an offer on the table to become new Arkansas coach, according to source. Deal is reportedly 5-yr/27.5M.

Sometimes I take Dairy Queen coupons to Burger King, and when they refuse them, I scream “That’s your fucking wife!!!”

A thousand injured Russians agree:

As best as I can tell, the only people who are fully metric-fluent in America are scientists and drug traffickers.

Atlanta aquarium

"You need to backup the system. So, get a blank disk and put it in the zip drive" #EvesdropedDenverAirport

The 1st Annual Chili and Blueberry Pie Eating Contest And Immediately Afterward 10 Mile Fun Sprint For Literacy has been cancelled.

I blame her.