Ni hao sucka my nuts

Me and Burnskizzy are getting general tso drunk tn Rob Gucci

If Rob Gucci was awake, he would know that I’m more fucking Kung Pow than he is tonight

Does every guy get a boner on a flight? Be honest lmk

The fucking lefts are so pissed right now. #kamala

Haven’t been active on this thing. Most of the reason was because I was in a relationship. Apologies to everyone

Speaking of being single now. I want to start off by saying, I’m at the airport. Waiting to pick up grandma. I’m seeing all these absolute piss missiles of chicks walk out. Either I become an uber driver for airport boards, or a security guard

Just realized this is America and it’s legal to get a boner in public

Starting to think my place when I die isn’t heaven. Some recent events I’ve been doing… 1. Matching with fat girls on tinder to think they have a chance with me 2. Doing a line off a strippers rack 3. Threw a cheeseburger in a homeless shelter and said fight That’s just today

Currently so piss drunk…thinking of my kids. Wish my wife would fuck off and let me see them. Sorry Dianne, I like to drink. Not my fault my 3 year old got a hold of my beers

I hate to say it, but I’m going to get drunk tonight

To any girl that is out there…I’m horny

In need of a medical trainer tonight…so drunk I pissed myself

HELP ME!! HELP ME

I gotta say, this bartender is a piss missile. I probably would

How dumpnchase, M.D, Burnskizzy and I are leading the charge tonight

I swear if my ex wife texts me complaining about the kids during her week again, I’m going to lose my mind. I only get 1 day with them

About to have another chin to shin type of night

I’m too drunk to be texting and driving right now. Should probably be safe and get off my phone?

Hate to say it, but you might find the name "Burn David Skizzy" on the Epstein Files... sorry mom, I just wanted to party rock. #Clintonskilledhim