AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

tattoos DO NOT hurt you’re just bitch made

An on the whim tattoo is always the way to go 🤌🏼🤌🏼

Telling my boss that I’m gonna start Pilates and his response was: “Pilates sounds a lot like rum chata don’t it? I think you should just get a bottle of that.” Not sure on his rhyming skills but I appreciate his input

If Bailey tells me she’s proud of me every single day I think that’ll be enough motivation for me to workout consistently and not give up 🥲

This and some sad country music

I think I’m on a huge fast downward spiral if anyone knows how to hit the brakes and downward spiral a little more slowly.

BUT YOU CAN TALK TO GOD ABOUT THAT

#NewProfilePic

That mother fucker knew what he was doing.

not my circus but admittedly those ARE my monkeys

Unfortunately, I do enjoy watching the downfall of people who did me wrong.

My coworker JUST realized he is 27 and his birthday is in December.

Spent every other weekend in this house. Tears could be cried but I turned out better than okay and I’m just so happy I can go back after 16 years and look at this house to reflect. Abandoned but still loved.

If I die and people want to memorialize me… please for the love of Satan do not put angel wings around my picture. I want flames or cases of Busch light and tequila.

Despite what it may seem, I do actually have my shit together.