My favorite historical fact is that when the “moors conquered Spain” they were pretty much coasting through Europe, but one of the main reasons they stopped is because they thought it was gross.

Listen now. You don’t know Ben Shapiro or Charlie Kirk because they’re good. You know them because billionaires grew them in a lab.

Anyone out there an expert in anal? I could use some rectum-endations.

Breaking : guys like this call us ped*s then go to Disneyland alone to film children.

Sometimes I randomly remember that Adam Corolla and Jimmy Kimmel both hosted The Man Show.

“The worst thing about high school girls as I approach the speed of light? They get older. I stay the same age.” - interstellar

Charlie Kirk accuses lefties of not being masculine while sitting in a way that proves he has literally no dick or balls.

Love getting accused of “thinking I’m smarter than everybody” by people whose entire political identity is “calling everyone ret*rded.”

The espresso martini is the Red Bull vodka for people who pretend to respect themselves.

Guys all elons wealth is leveraged against Tesla stock.

You’re right we should trust a billionaire who lied about being good at a video game.

I’m so famous. My video is going viral again please deal with this and get in on the ground floor of my multilevel video scheme. youtu.be/wRe2vHPcQP0?si…

I like how some people are like “the me too movement was stupid. We cancelled a ton of people based on baseless accusations and no due process anyway Hillary Clinton drank child blood I saw it on a meme w a cat that had laser eyes.”

Normalize coopon not kyupon

Why does it feel like literally everyone in the blue origin capsule or talking about the blue origin capsule is either happily or angrily jerking themselves off?

“Let’s make like some yeasty buns and rise.” - Jesus #yeasterSunday

In Iran they call the movies Illegally Blonde.

I’m your algae. You’re my fungus. I need you and you need me. Lichen, subscribe.

Every republican, libertarian, democrat, independent, Oregonian militiaman, and decent human being should be losing their shit over Trump sending the marines to LA. This is what most of you have been warning about for a very long time. WYA? Speak up. Speak out.