today is my birthday!!! 🎉🎂🥳🎈🎊🎁 (lying for attention)

the tummy is the achilles heel of the human body

too bad global warming isn’t taking away our billionaires - it’s taking away our billion airs!

you’re telling me a stir fried this noodles???

i can tell exactly who is clean and who isn’t. i am an embath.

It takes a strong man to admit he’s weak.

what’s next… the king’s SPEECH?!

inside everyone is two dogs. one is good and the other is bad. which one will you give t-r-e-a-t-s?

Hearing a lot about Russia and Ukraine right now. #But what about that RUSH O serotonin when U CRANE your neck to see couples fighting in public ☺️ ??

PRODUCTIVITY IS SIN

being an adult is wild because one minute you’re fuddying and the next minute you’re duddying

Wensday*

there was a time your mom sat you down and never picked you back up again

#CremateBrennen

I've been observing how leftist people fall for fake news on this website and I have to say that J*hnny D*pp propaganda is the most successful campaign I've seen in a while. Here's a short thread of what I've observed.

"The meta-textual literary conceit of students finding a script or book and working their way through it is not a breakthrough in narrative technology, but I’ve never seen it deployed so effectively." leoweekly.com/2022/08/review…

.Air Canada a little help here? I have had my itinerary changed due to weather and now I won’t get to my final destination until a day later than planned. And you don’t offer any help for accommodation or rebooking onward travel? I can’t speak to anyone, this is my last hope.