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This week had my number.

If Stranger Things was British.

At this point, it’s Emmanuel and Princess Against Education 🤝

When I was little the closest thing I had to a treehouse was a stump in the backyard.

If it wont do it we gonna get us another one.

Is there a way to short the used vehicle market? A man could make a killing…

I have started seeing someone. Not as in dating, but as in hallucinations.

Interest is up and the stock market’s down.

Nerf or nothing

Even if you could afford it, you can’t find it.

Three stages of a man’s life: Stud, Dud, Thud

The gorilla beats the man, the man beats the gun, the gun beats the gorilla, if you tie you die!

My gosh I get it One Tree Hill had a reunion

Don’t see kids with bb guns anymore but every one of em got a tablet.

Yes. I would accept the terms Elon Musk has mentioned publicly with 2 other requests: 1. A salary of $1/year 2. A reasonable equity incentive (beyond my life savings investment) We would drive twitter to a trillion $ valuation within 5 years. 100% serious!

My cousin told me that her new man doesn’t like her fruit jokes. Personally, I think she needs to let that mango.

If they make a movie about the Alex Murdaugh murder trial then Judge Newman needs to be played by Morgan Freeman.

DONALDJTRUMP.COM

And a little red truck, hawling a Christmas tree.