Unfortunately for my haters I am just getting cooler and hotter

I may be awkward and annoying but once you get to know me I’m actually so much worse

Just scream when the baby screams

Just work when the baby works

Clean the house when the baby cleans the house

And for my next trick I’ll take something that isn’t a big deal and turn it into a huge issue

Me 2.5 minutes into Costco unsupervised: “Do I need a couch?”

Being an adult means deleting the 3 sentences of rage from your email and just responding: “sure no problem!”

Me 6 minutes into my unsupervised Costco run: “I am so out of my depth”

*Me walking in with my lil Sam’s Club card* I don't see how you can hate from outside the club, you can't even get in 😂 Leggo

“The only way out is through” Me: *does 3 point turn* ✌🏼

Important

Taylor Swift just got engaged. PSLs are back at Starbucks. Incredible day for millennial white women.

If you were to die tomorrow, do you think you’ve had enough burrata?

I think he goes to Burning Man (derogatory)

How it feels when your insurance doesn’t cover egg freezing/ IVF

We chat how to finance fertility treatments in this week’s episode! podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bot…

Slipping into madness, anyone want anything?

It is a YAP fest on the pod this week talking mom hacks, nap dresses, roommate stage, finding the “village”, type C moms and MORE 😂🫶🏼 #mompodcast #motherhood #momlife podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/bot…

I think I speak for everyone when I say FAaCKGTGJUGGVRGMMHVVHHHHAHHHHHHHBBHHTGHOKKNJCDDOLJIBYC A OHH N