Excuse the cliche but I’m going to have to travel to Japan over this

If I were a cat I would purr liberally and meow sparingly

Hey man we need to have a serious meow about this later

This meeting could have been a sword fight

What, that stuff on my Birkenstock clogs ? Oh that’s just clay. Yeah, like pottery. I just got back from the studio. You into artsy guys btw ?

Ethnic wasian vs orthodox wasian

Smoking on that shit that made the virgin marry

I can eat a lot of weird shit. I can’t do sardines. Idk how you freaks do it

Just rolled a fat one who wants to come through

I’ve eaten some dog foods. They’re bland, but I can usually see the appeal. Cat food is disgusting. Probably why cats have more attitude

Rice cookers and laundry machines can tell when you’re in a rush. And they will humble you when necessary

I don’t trust people who sleep on their backs

Going to open a cafe where my competitive advantage is having poop friendly washrooms. The main reason I drink coffee at home is because there’s a guaranteed safe place to poop after. I can’t be the only one

Just deadlift bro. It hits your “core”. It works your “posterior chain”. It fatigues your “central nervous system”. It’s heavy. It’s gotta be good for you.

Don’t have any food in da house hopefully I don’t get hungry today

Sorry I’m late. I was watching YouTube shorts in the car. I don’t want to be here

Making the most out of 7cm this Valentine’s Day

Attempting a pan sauce for the first time ever rn under the tutelage of ChatGPT

If you’ve ever abbreviated clavicular to clav ur ngmi

Time for my ultra processed highly palatable slop bowl