When I crouch in my car to get under a low parking structure I am making my car smaller to fit. Do not come at me.

“Self care” is the new Pogs.

Have you ordered your ham yet?

Getting older is casual crossing your legs and pulling something in your neck.

***goes outside*** DADS: Couldn’t have ordered up a better day gang!

***DADS AT COACHELLA*** “Hey champ, make sure you get some sunscreen on the back of your neck. It’s gonna be a scorcher!”

Desperately trying to use my skillz to pay my billz.

Game of Thrones or “home for Thanksgiving at the local bar seeing all your high school friends”???

Those on the east coast who give GOT spoilers are now called “ja-thronies.” Don’t be a ja-thronie.

Watch, share, live.

Ever wake up in a cold sweat wondering, “should I be watching Bosch?”

Vulture write up! Cool!!

Corn on the Cobb’s & ColeShaw

Have not reached quarantine level where I’ll start watching Peaky Blinders.

This is happening next Friday!

If I had a twin I know id be the fat one.

Overheard in LA: “It’s a MANK kind of night.”

Ditto, although I did pay my outstanding book fee out of fear. Go Bruins!

This hangout could have been a text.

WAZE will be like: “Turn left on Sawtelle. Congrats you are now in standstill traffic you big dumb idiot!!!”