Respect my trans homies.

The ball is alive and doesn’t like being thrown around like that

The downside is that the world is ending. On the other hand, we really peaked with the Doritos Cheesy Gordita Crunch so what’s the point of pressing on anyway.

Be the reason someone listens to Phoebe Bridgers today.

Everything Everywhere All at Once is a movie I really love. It however is not how I wanted to experience my emotions today.

I live my life a quarter life crisis at a time.

Simon Says was the beginning of my issues with authority.

If you think white people don’t have our own culture, you’ve clearly never seen a bachelorette party in Nashville wearing pink cowboy hats dancing to Toby Keith in a wagon being pulled by a tractor.

The fact that Taurus season starts on 4/20 is the main reason I believe in astrology.

Last night I heard The Mountain Goats cover a verse and chorus of Rich Mullins’ Calling Out Your Name. Not to be dramatic but I think I can die happy now.

You call them red flags, I call them relationship opportunities.

I promise the stomp. The whole stomp. Nothing but the stomp

I love a deep cut

“You’re a fire ant, not a fire can’t” —an insect life coach probably

I still haven’t gotten over how disappointing laser jet printers are

Is Elon gonna get upset if we keep deadnaming twitter?

I am in this tweet