It warmed my heart to see the local businesses in Chinatown undercutting the fuck outta the parking businesses yesterday. I got to pay 60% less (even while throwing them a tip) to support people who actually work in the community.🔥

The bees that go around pollinating are the only cool bugs idc

I miss Hasbulla’s instagram lives 😭😭

The quickest way to ruin any kind of housing listing is by having some ugly ass bedding. Immediate no.

Death penalty for people who stop on the freeway because they missed their exit

Gf just said “And you haven’t even watched Lord Of The Rings?! You’re missing out on so much of your heritage!” (Calling me a hobbit) …

We’re about 2 weeks away from every dad in America saying “big third down here” in unison. And it’s always a big third down.

Me paying a day and a half of my wages because a cop pulled me over for driving like 1 mile in the HOV lane in heavy traffic… A great reminder that our country is so fucking cool & just and cops are really keeping us safe, thank u Police!😩🙏🏼💯

If the NCAA can figure out NIL and realignment, surely they can figure out that a sack occurs on a pass play and should not result in negative rushing yards

"Made up stat" is a hilarious phrase. As opposed to those stats that exist within the laws of nature, spun within the fabric of the universe just waiting to be discovered by a curious enough mind.c

hasanabi The cop got confused and thought it was his wife

UWANIMAL just dropped🚨

Don’t worry, the NYPD and their $12 billion will do nothing to help

Watching UW beat the ducks twice in the same year😌😌😌😌