I hate myself so much for eating. I can't stand watching my fucking fat legs.

I hate overeating at night

There's nothing feeling worse than overeating at night!

Why can't I just die?

I want to start over, I want to lose weight and to just stop eating.

I miss the feeling of being in control of myself.

I feel like there is no one to fight for any longer since he has gone. I still want him back

But as long as I can't have him which is probably forever, I should become skinny.

2 days without a warm meal are a at least a start. Weekend will be tough bc my parents come visit me.

Thought I saw him today and it felt like hell. Still missing him.

On one hand all I want to do is eating. On the other hand I never want to eat again?

I need(!) to control this damn hunger.

Why does he still is kinda like in contact with these girls but he never contacted me?

I asked myself the whole day: Why them, not me?

He just left me and said he might contact me. And here I am, waiting but there is nothing to come as it seems.

What do they have that I don't have? Why them, not me?

I just really want to hurt myself right now.

I'm on a class trip until Friday and I don't know how to stay in control of eating.

It's like so easy when I'm all alone.

Friendship doesn't seem to mean anything to her.