I’ll serve crack before I serve this country

Do you remember when you joined X? I do! #MyXAnniversary i remember when it was twitter

ㅤ

three glasses of water, 16 oz steak, plus side and soup completely demolished. yep, still a #RealEater

HSM2 continuing to be the greatest movie of all time 💯💯

i don't think we should be bombing anyone over there but if we're dead set on it i've got a suggestion for a more deserving target

3 year anniversary dinner call me chef sanji

superman really was everything that i’ve been hearing BILLIONS MUST HOPE A BETTER WORLD IS POSSIBLE

this is crazy cause as a #RealEater that entire bucket is gone mid movie, no dropped pieces. with prices like that i gotta savor every kernel

literally worse than doflamingo’s ass too wtf worst timeline

Being informed is the worst thing I’ve ever done for my mental health

got the flu, $250 copay, turns out my pharmacy doesn’t have the meds i need, have to call a different pharmacy, they put me on hold for 20 min, drive an hour round trip for my meds, insurance doesn’t even cover anything, another $100 for meds just put me in the casket already

my boy got put in cryostasis 😭

DISNEY BOUGHT THE FUCKING SUPER BOWL??

me in 2070 when the kids are rediscovering TPing peoples houses

I'm hitting g-forces on this forklift that would make a fighter pilot fucking shit himself*