Underwear manufacturers desperate to put their name around my waist will be second against the wall (first is cafe owners who put the napkin underneath my food).

Pretty serious technical issue with Co-op Insurance - their systems accidentally increased my automatic renewal price by 30%, then an agent reduced it down after I got in touch with them!!! Obviously not a cynical money-grabbing ploy, so must be a software glitch....

Guys I think I’ve found the oddest and most modernly proustian thing on the internet wikihow.com/Pass-Time

Tom Doggett it’s unlikely I’ll ever get to your pub but I’d like to thank you for your stance on Clarkson. It’s important and appreciated. I hope your new brew choice does well and you and your staff don’t get too much flak. Cheers.

Yes!!

heard a girl on the bus in clapham call the cost of living crisis the Cozzie Livs :(

I appear to have entirely lost the ability to order tweets by 'latest' and it's reverted back to the appalling algorithm-based system. No way to change it... anyone else?

Oh! Yes, thank you. God, imagine changing something that I'm used to....!

Absolutely nothing, because if you're rich then fixed penalties are just convenience fees.

🤔

One of the best things about cars is how they enabled shops to exist. Before cars, High Streets were empty and people stood around thinking ‘if only somebody could invent the car, we could finally invent shops because without cars shops just aren’t possible’.

Brutal behaviour from the Blue Cross charity shop in Ludlow. Two biography sections next to each other, one labelled Celebrities, the other 'Celebrities'. Never has punctuation worked so hard.

Who do I know who's involved in any of the River Wye campaigns & similar cleanup projects..?

Incredibly proud of this :)

Huzzah!

Congratulations, Donald. Quite the accomplishment.

💰💰💰 An app for £1 a month which warns you if the Indian restaurant you're about to enter has a table of 6+ men occupying the atmosphere, using AI to detect the heady sense of top banter💰💰💰