Every night, when I lay my precious angel baby head down to sleep, I catch myself hoping America Ferrera is relishing the fact that she is the most important woman in the universe

If you also watched this video religiously around 15 years ago, my friend says it’s probably the reason we’re 100 gecs fans now . Been reflecting on this for a little while

It ain’t spring til I get my hands on a roly-poly

Why does god give me his toughest battles (showing me endless Facebook ads for wolf romance fan fiction)??????

I moved from one rental to another so yall know I’m, once again, walking like that one guy from No Country for Old Men because my thighs are chafing

i’m an amc stubs a-list member

I’m not too interested in dating these days, so how can I let the guys on Bumble know I’m just looking for someone to delete my 30,000+ unread emails

y’all the minds behind steven universe, adventure time, and over the garden wall are uniting to make the adventure time movie ? seated n sat

I am so glad everything is broken at work today so I could make this

For 2 weeks straight, the only thing I’ve thought about is my sister asking me to play a song by Beabadoobee, but what she said was “play that poo poo pee pee girl”.

If y’all see friend suggestions on Snapchat for someone named chicken nugget eyeball, it’s just the account I made so my nephew can use funny filters so plz ignore

if we have plans and i send you this picture it means i’m not coming

Another day, another failed attempt at resisting the urge to choose any name other than this one

I could burn cities to ashes on a bad eyebrow day (today is a bad eyebrow day)

Crazy how people come up with nicknames for their pets. Like why do I keep calling my cat “Jehovahs Witness”