photo of Sam back in high school

What’s the cats name? Juanita?

M John Shamylan

Pretty glonky

*flapjack voice* “Peg me with your pegged leg, Captn K’nuckles”

Not the first song that plays this morning being what’s new Scooby Doo. Guess I gotta take a shot

I have become decompose

My girl is choking on a gas station horse cock

Me: rose are you mad at me Rose: no *hours later* Rose: Yeah, I’ll watch your movie someday… when I’m really really drunk

I’ve been thinking about Nyan Cat lately.

Should I shave my eyebrows like Jenna marbles?

Fuck that loud ass scary ass MGM lion

Some cultures are defined by their relationship to cheese

Every great editor is a stoner but not every stoner is a great editor

Sober lily, remember: Recyce (pronounced: re•kee•kee)

the mulch mule (PATENT PENDING)

Fell asleep while trying to meditate. I feel ripped off, I want a refund

I wonder if the reason warmer and softer light is more appealing (especially at night) is because our ancestors slept fireside and the soft warm glow of the fire was a constant in their lives. Also, is everyone doing the thread now? Am I alone on Twitter? The desolate wasteland🌵

I’m really just out here trying to clown around with the boyz

“I remember the days when Quinn Bennett was a household name, geawddammit!!” -Me