Can you afford to spare those? "Kim Kardashian: Spare a thought for the people of Haiti today Xo bit.ly/xTiyfN"

I think Mac Miller is the second coming of Vanilla Ice minus the hit song. #RealityCheck

Who are you talking to?? "Kim Kardashian: You can do it I believe in ya baby!"

You look AMAZING as a brunette. Bree Olson #FACT

#AmericanIdol needs to go away #cancelthatshit

Yo Chad Johnson, you gonna hit up an IHOP in Indy?

America, land of the fat and lazy.#RealityCheck

Bring a newspaper or good book "Teresa Fiddy: Longest hour of my life starts now."

"I'm a dirty whore" -unknown

"Teresa Fiddy: I wish he'd answer..." Ok, here i am

C-A-N-T SLEEP #FUInsomnia

New greeting when i see people: "Hello, cum drop" #Catchy

"Kim Kardashian: Baking cupcakes twitpic.com/8bec2l" those look good. feed me some topless.

Who's DTF?? #Horny

"Teresa Fiddy: I can honestly say a broken heart is the worst pain in the world." Ever get kicked in the dick?? #WorstPain