I've been laughing at this for so long I'm going to pass away any minute

I need some headphones that actually risk damaging my hearing

Too many games make you run from shit as soon as you start

Eating a yoghurt in bed feels illegal but I be doing it

It's been like pitch black since 5pm and I love it

Someone is spending their afternoon dirty calling my office and I can't be arsed mate 😭

Leggings that claim to be opaque but then show the entire world my anus are my nemesis

Why has my boiler decided to pack in on the first cold night 😪😭

I have one gentle son and one demon

I literally only use AI to put hats on my pets and I love it (sunglasses too)

Accidentally got my cat in to prosciutto and I fear he now expects a quality of life that I cannot afford

Man, I don't know crap about heck

I'm sick and my little cat won't leave my side but he keeps getting his claws stuck in the duvet cover. Used the tiny bit of energy I have to change it just for him

Someone send me money please I am BROKE and the cat wants soup

Finally watched 28 Years Later. That was a lot of penis.

My little girl will be crossing the rainbow bridge this afternoon and my heart is absolutely broken

Goodnight little one ❤️

I am simply so sleepy

Just heard my cat walk face first in to the bedroom door. Gonna be one of those nights

I feel like the phrase "Make this too hot to handle" Is very universal credit coded