“my child is completely fine!” ma’am your child cries every time “vienna” by billy joel comes on

a good key change in a song literally has the capacity to change my life

Am I eating chicken tenders while drinking a green juice? Yeah, it’s called balance

oh look it's me

Am I the only one that sees a problem with working 8-9 hours a day and then going home to having about 4 hours to yourself which includes getting ready for the next day??? This is not life…

brutal hippo attack caught on camera

The blue meth from Breaking Bad looks like forbidden rock candy

Nails popped off today 💅🏻🌈💍

Maybe Leo Dicaprio breaks up with girls at 25 because they get kicked off their parents insurance at 26 and he doesn't want to be financially responsible for them

hello i'm back and tweeting into the void

Current mood: don’t perceive me

Back to basics 🤎🍂

I’m watching Sex and the City for the first time all the way through and here are my hot takes 1. Carrie is kind of the worst and super sex negative especially for being a sex writer 2. I don’t understand the appeal of Big AT ALL 3. Carrie didn’t deserve Aidan

take me to the pumpkin patch or else

Halfway through working a bachelorette party last night I was told I was dancing on the woman who played young Jess on New Girl. Life is wild and @laurendairowens is a sweetheart!

You were AMAZING!! Thank you for such a wonderful night we’re still talking about it!!! 🤍🤍

*texting my spouse on our wedding day* hiiii did you still wanna get married today? no worries if not!

“For the Gods” is available everywhere now 🌌✨🔮🪐 listen wherever you consume your music Producer: John Caviness 🎧 Co-writer: @maia_kelly ✍️ it’s been 3 long years since I’ve release music but I couldn’t think a better come back song 💒❤️‍🔥 🔗 in bio

just remembered vienna waits for me