ever since i saw the trailer i knew that i needed to watch this high out of my mind with a bucket of popcorn at 11am on a tuesday

BECOME UNGOVERNABLE

Ben Sasse is a member of a political party that has done everything it can for decades now to create a political economy in which fewer and fewer Americans can afford to raise a family in comfort, security, and dignity. Talking about candy crush or whatever is pure silliness.

this is the bleakest thing i've ever read lmfao

going to the bathroom at 3am using a middle school classmate's linkedin profile as a flashlight

i think about her every day

“Great news Liz Lemon! The little guy on your other side is named Bob Dylan! He’s also good at ping pong! (Low, serious voice) he lives in the sand, it’s very confusing”

you guys would love a gas station in central florida

I’ll admit, when I was a kid in the 90s I definitely thought that Kid Rock would have less direct involvement with military operations

did anyone consider that he is a) a tiny baby and b) there is nothing in the rules that says a cat can't play outfielder???

the zoom in is brutal

oomf urgently called to inform us that his friend ate shit biking on the west side highway bike path and a man helped him up + asked if he was ok and when he looked up it was none other than mayor zohran mamdani on his citibike. closest you can get irl to being saved by spiderman

sister yessssss. teach me your ways sister

He always looks like a hibachi chef is about to throw him shrimp

Just told my wife I’m electrified by her presence every day and she said “because I’m on my eel shit. oo girl”

Every now and then I remember Tim Walz’s “they’re weird” campaign and how close the dems were to actually shifting the way people perceive the right in a very real way and then they just…stopped

El capibara, un animal que se lleva bien con todo el mundo, ha sido visto utilizando un armadillo como vehículo.

them smoking at the met gala while hudson is shirtless trying to put his jacket on connor whose arms are too big to fit into it I hope they never change

this is such sister behavior i'm obsessed.