In unrelated news, Mexico is reporting a sudden, inexplicable shortage of “Burritos Grande” in the Mexico City area.

I’m not in the stock market so I don’t give a shit.

The same very smart people who said inflation was going to be transitory are also able to see into the future and tell us how the tariffs are going to play out.

Or - and I’m just spitballing here - don’t cash out your 401K today.

They got into a tin can on top of a tank full of tens of thousands of gallons of explosive liquid oxygen and hydrogen. They did alright.

You know what would be funny?

It’s been awhile since I scrolled X. I bet things are pretty chil… GODDAMNIT LILLY!

The fact that her name is Karen is further proof that we’re living in a simulation.

Tweets from Virginia in 1860:

From the looks of her the food never makes it to the table.

Covid either killed you or turned you into a burger-flipping nihilist.

Please just shut up.

Wut

Aloha, bitches.

I have a homeless person a dollar yesterday AND I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY NOW, JESUS!

I don’t think he thought this all the way through.

Well…yeah.

Nothing funnier than an economist in a snit.