Everything becomes worse when you realize her episode aired on 9/11 like even the schedule was playing in her face

Yesterday I saw a bird with a worm at 4pm. Don’t ever let anyone tell you you have to get up early...

I’m Californian before I’m American

IG looks like a dying mall

whenever I buy food now it’s $17 and I’m like “okay that’s fine.” but privately it is not fine.

Don't have kids my toddler deadass lost her cheeseburger somewhere in my apartment

Pregnancy is beautiful and should be cherished unless you my hg if you MY hg and pregnant you need to go to the clinic

I hate a "it smell like weed" ass coworker now if I get caught it's gone smell like knuckle sandwich in this btch

they in them warehouses with WHIPS & CHAINS

when someone is laughing & socializing instead of taking their turn at the board game we're playing

My met gala theme would be “cheesecake factory”

dipping my tacos in patron tomorrow ian come to play

Everybody just happy to look a mess

If gas is $6.99 here in OHIO, that shit must be $22.75 in Cali

Heidi Klum’s outfit was probably in the back of her closet as an option from Halloween 2019. Stay ready so you never gotta get ready.

Airlines sending me "we're in this together" emails. When my suitcase was 52 pounds I was on my own.

ungodly hour just came on shuffle

somebody pick my baby up from school i’m at the bar.

it taste like it