Hey! What’s that bird doing eating from my squirrel feeder?!

I wear pants to all Zoom meetings but I only button the top 2 buttons of my shirt.

Every morning, I wake up hoping that this is just a bad dream and I’m really late for work.

God: Olive oil will be required in all recipes. Also God: And if you get even the slightest drop on your clothes, it will stain and ruin them FOREVER MWAHAHAHAH

If we really want to beat COVID, we should just draft it to the #Mets

2020 is the Joy of Phish albums.

Applying to be on the show Alone just so I can get a few hours to myself.

A little strange that they made a national holiday for Veterinarians. Oh well—thanks for your service!

If a 40 year-old man rewatching the Harry Potter movies is wrong, I don’t want to be right.

These at home covid tests don’t work AT ALL. My kid tested positive twi … oh. Fuck.

When one of your kids gives the other kid covid:

🚨🚨🚨 THE NEW YORK KNICKS HAVE BEEN ELIMINATED FROM THE PLAYOFFS 🚨🚨🚨 There is now a 100% chance #phish will have Madison Square Garden for their New Year's Run 4/20-4/23!

Wooks are descending on MSG in 12 days🤘🏼⭕️ Check out our PixelWook truck before the Phish shows. Snap a photo of the truck & tag us on social to win one of our Celebrity Wook airdrops. We’re giving away 10 total & you must mint a (free) wook to enter. Let's rage🤘🏼

From the start of this project, everyone said there's no overlap btwn the jamband & NFT communities. But every day we got new wooks & new degens rolling in. Our crew is growing fast & we hope you'll come rage with us ⭕🤘 #pixelwooks #pixelart #phanart #nftart #venndiagram

#NewProfilePic How am I looking pixelw👀ks ?!?

Gm wooks! Can we talk about last night? ✅ 130+ in sales ✅ Increase in floor price ✅ Increase in # of wook owners ✅ Trending on icy.tools - NFT Tracking & Alerts + OpenStream - Tool Analytics - Minting Now ✅ And we had fun 😎✌️ Thanks to all those that made it happen. 2022 is the summer of the wooks. Come rage with us!

🗽Less than a week til @w3bstock + NFT.NYC! Kick it off with us on 6/20! 🎤Music: DJ Logic Dyl 🔥 DAP The Contract 🦧NFT Installations: CryptoBroskis 📍@W3BSTOCK 2023 MetaFans pixelw👀ks 🏙 Amazing Space +🍸Open Bar 🎟w3bstock.io

explaining why I have to go to Atlantic City for all 3 nights of #Phish

🎉 Happy New Year! 🎉 From the W3BSTOCK family to yours … we wish you a blessed and prosperous 2023. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for supporting our web3 live music dream ❤️ As a token of our gratitude, here’s a little free mint for ya bit.ly/w3bstocknye 😎

⚡️ ANNOUNCEMENT OF AN ANNOUNCEMENT ⚡️ 🎉 The 2nd annual W3BSTOCK NYC is happening in exactly one month, on Tuesday, April 11th 🙌 Full lineup of 50+ artists, musicians, performers and NFT projects dropping this Monday, March 13th 👀 Keep it tuned right here!