One mistake and everyone judges you.

I'd kick you in the vagina but I don't wanna lose my shoe...

There's always that one person who catches you doing something weird.

I miss having you to talk to whenever i wanted.

*looks in mirror* oh, that's why people don't like me

When a girl says "Do whatever you want" Do NOT do whatever you want.

My attitude is based on how YOU treat me

I just received one of those chain emails! Apparently if i don't send it to 10 people a girl will appear in my closet.. guess who's getting laid tonight!

I wonder if teachers play the “who’s a virgin” game in their heads in class.

The best memories come from bad ideas.

Best joke ever: My love life.

I hate when people text me hours later trying to continue the conversation... bitch the feeling is gone.

Mirror mirror on the wall, I am sexy; screw you all.

Wish school started at like... never.

Find someone who can change your life and not just your relationship status.

The leading cause of death for Albanian men ages 18-35 is Liam Neeson

If my best friend hates you then I automatically hate you.

Those "screw everything, I hate everyone" days.

Mum: Why is your room always so messy? Me: So that if someone comes in and tries to kill me, they’ll trip over something and die.

I'm one of the nicest assholes you could ever hope to meet.