Attention: BIOLOGICAL WOMEN. DO NOT SEND ME ANY FUCKING TITTY OR ASS PICTURES, I WILL BE VERY VERY ANGRY. 😡😡😡 If you are trying to play a funny prank on me, please don’t totally DM your thick buttcheeks and/or knocking milkers. Don’t do it. Seriously. #Booby #Ass #Milkers

Ambatufish #Ambatukum #Buss #Buss #Dontkum #Aughhhhh

Bitches that wear shorts with no ass be like “ahh, you got a flat tire.” #FlatBooty #MasterChef #PanCakes

My boss told me to “have a good day”, so I jacked my fucking wiener off immediately! #Meat #Cum #UpAndDownMotion #CircleJerk #360MeatCopter #LickItUpToSavePaper #WankSauce

It’s not erectile dysfunction girl, my dick’s just being modest. 🤥#SmallPeePeeGang #ED #StillBeatTho #LeftwardSloping #Circumsized

My Girl: “Are you a top or bottom???” Me: “JELLYFISHING!”

*Sigh* Another day of being banned from Footlocker for tasting the shoes. #FeetLover #FeetDisciple #FeetConnoisseur #MirandaCosgroveLooksLikeMichaelJackson

I put the peanut butter and jelly in the ass. I call it the peanut butter and jelly ass sandwich, but you’re gonna be calling it lunch. #Nerd #PBJ #AssSandwich #WhatsForDinDin #Supper

The best part about eating a Reese’s Peanut Bussy Cup is taking off it’s lil panties. #ImBoutToPeaNUT #ThatFatAssIndexFingerMakesMeMad #PeenyBussyCup

I fucked a blind bitch one time and she told me “you have the biggest dick I’ve ever put my hands on”. I said “you’re pulling my leg”. That’s it. That’s the joke. #FunnyBugsBunny #Penis #NarnersBro

Aye man, whoever got the Voodoo Doll of your old pal Craig. Please stroke it a lil. Prime Goon O’clock right now. 🥜💦💦 #Splooge #LikeAnnabelleButAGrownAssMan #ChrisSmoove #Splaaassshhh

Bitches be like “my name is baby”. Okay then bitch, then I’m gonna leave you in a hot car. #YourNameIsBitch #Bitch #KylesMom #RaspberryPoundCake

P. Diddy didn’t update to iOS 18, because he said “17 just feels right”. #Diddler #PhonesOrSomeShit #PDF #FILE

Know this chick that just posted about her new bob haircut. That shit looked so awful. Bitch, that’s a ROBERT. #HamSandwich #BeefStrokinOff

Craig here, Are lesbians with fat fingers considered “Well Hung”? #FingerBlast #CarpetMunch #FortniteBattleBus #BruceJenner

It’s too damn cold outside.. But, it’s perfect weather to force an underpaid ethnic minority to deliver Chinese food. #OrdaDaFryRyePree #WontonChickenEggroll #FreddyWong

I once slept with a chick back in early college and regretted it because she was kind of a bitch, so I hit her with the SA allegations. #MenInFemaleFields #Girlboss #SkiJumpingFamily

Why the roaches always pop out ONLY when I got people over? NIGGA, GO TO YOUR ROOM BITCH! #CheesecakeHoes #CombatMaxRoachKiller #TittyTuesday

Hate when mf’s say “Man, why didn’t we learn this in school?” MOTHAFUCKA, you were too busy drawing dicks on yo desk 😒. #PerfumeDontCoverUpStank #BigVeinyOne #UpsideDownSnickersBar

Women don’t make it easy, Like, damn bitch, you been right every single time for 5 thousand arguments. You don’t find that even a LITTLE SUSPICIOUS??? #RecommissionThePimpHand #BlackOps7 #ShitGame #ToeJamAndEarl #BringBackTravisScottToTheItemShop